More than a look at marriage and family part 3

Could you give me a brief review of what we learned in last week concerning the husband protecting his wife?

(Throughout the New Testament we always see the comparison of Christ and the church with the husband and his wife. All that Christ has done for his church the husband is expected to do for his wife this includes being willing to lay down his life for the sake of his wife.
"The husband is to wash his wife in the word of God just as Christ did for the church so that he can be able to present her to God without spot or blemish.")

Could you give me a brief review of what we learned about the effects of the curse in marriages?

What does God's word tell us is necessary to have the type of marriage God wants for us?

What was the one glaring flaw we have seen in the illustration so far?
(one flesh)

As we move on to today  we want to continue to look at this Husband Umbrella concerning provision.

As we saw last week the husband is to make sure his wife's need are met just as he would his own.

Does the illustration demonstrate the full council of God's word concerning how the family is to be provided for?

It is often assumed that the main responsibility for provisions for the home is to come through the efforts of the husband and is dismissive of those efforts of the wife. The Bible however gives many examples of wives who helped to provide for the needs of the home. The most commonly recognized passages concerning the wife's efforts in providing for her home come from Proverbs 31.

Let us look at a few of those now:
"How hard it is to find a capable wife! She is worth far more than jewels! Her husband puts his confidence in her, and he will never be poor. As long as she lives, she does him good and never harm. She keeps herself busy making wool and linen cloth. She brings home food from out-of-the-way places, as merchant ships do." (Pro 31:10-14)

"She looks at land and buys it, and with money she has earned she plants a vineyard. She is a hard worker, strong and industrious." (Pro 31:16-17)

"She is strong and respected and not afraid of the future. She speaks with a gentle wisdom. She is always busy and looks after her family's needs. Her children show their appreciation, and her husband praises her. " (Pro 31:25-28)

As we look back at the passages what do they speak to us about what the scriptures says concerning what the husband and wife are cable of in the home?

In scripture both the husband and the wife are capable and praised for providing for the various needs of the family.

2.   Providing the spiritual needs of the children:

It has been said it takes a village to raise a child. God however says it takes a husband and a wife who love Him, one another and are committed to raise their children to serve the Lord, to produce Godly offspring

Who can read Mal 2:13-16
“This is another thing you do: you cover the altar of the LORD with tears, with weeping and with groaning, because He no longer regards the offering or accepts it with favor from your hand.“Yet you say, ‘For what reason?’ Because the LORD has been a witness between you and the wife of your youth, against whom you have dealt treacherously, though she is your companion and your wife by covenant.“But not one has done so who has a remnant of the Spirit. And what did that one do while he was seeking a godly offspring? Take heed then to your spirit, and let no one deal treacherously against the wife of your youth.“For I hate divorce,” says the LORD (Mal. 2:13-16)

   Is God is concerned about the way a husband and wife treat one another and how it will affect their children?

How do we know that this is important to him?

(He says he will stand as a witness between the husband and wife and will not hear the prayers of those who deal treacherously with their spouse.)

  God takes the health of the family very seriously and so should we. It is God's love for the family that shows us the importance of raising our children to love and serve him. God feels we need to have both the husband and the wife in this and so should we.

   Throughout scripture we see that God desires the whole family to know and serve him and teaching the children was the responsibility of both the husband and the wife. The book of proverbs was almost written entirely by a father to his son.

Let us see what God says in the very beginning of Proverbs in chapter 1 vs 8 "Hear, my son, your father’s instruction And do not forsake your mother’s teaching; Indeed, they are a graceful wreath to your head And ornaments about your neck.

Let us also look at
: Eph. 22:6 "Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord."

From these passages what do we see concerning the roles of the Husband and wife towards the spiritual needs of their children?

In a day and age that the family is under attack from so many fronts there are many who say a child needs only one parent and does not need both a father and mother. In my life I have been both. I have been a single parent and I have had a wife and children. The simple truth is children do miss out when they do not have both a father and mother and when they do not have both often someone else outside of the family is needed to help fill the gap. 

    Over the years on several occasions I have served as a youth pastor and then as now when we do have the occasion to go on furlough I see many churches that have operated by keeping the various age groups separated.

It seems we have lost touch of our Lord's instruction and have done what has seemed right in our own eyes for far too long.

As a youth pastor I often would bring the young people and the older folks together.....
I wanted them to be together. to help and learn from one another. In the churches I have served in over the years I have often seen two mind-sets prevalent a burden "your Youth, no income The retired Christian. " I have already done my part... Adult Sunday School Class"

Sadly often the youth and elderly were in the same boat, good to have but not much use.
The reality is in the family and in the church we are missing out on a tremendous truth given to us in God's word:

Please read Titus 2:1-8
"But you must teach what agrees with sound doctrine.  Instruct the older men to be sober, sensible, and self-controlled; to be sound in their faith, love, and endurance.  In the same way instruct the older women to behave as women should who live a holy life. They must not be slanderers or slaves to wine. They must teach what is good,  in order to train the younger women to love their husbands and children,  to be self-controlled and pure, and to be good housewives who submit themselves to their husbands, so that no one will speak evil of the message that comes from God.  In the same way urge the young men to be self-controlled. In all things you yourself must be an example of good behavior. Be sincere and serious in your teaching. 8 Use sound words that cannot be criticized, so that your enemies may be put to shame by not having anything bad to say about us.

What do we see here concerning the what the Character of the elderly (spiritually mature) men is to be?

What of the older women?

There is cycle of maturing we see at play here can you describe it to me?

As you look around at our churches today which view on the youth and the elderly do you see taking place. The first one I described earlier (compartmentalized) or the one we just discussed?

Why do you think that is and what could be done to change it?

In a generation with so many without their father or mother in the home the church should be filling these gaps not dividing up into our own little groups.

As fathers and mothers it is important that we take those moments to teach and instruct our children as fathers to sons and as mothers to daughters why we have the opportunity to do so for this is what the Lord intends.

How has the Lord spoken to you today?
Click on Chart To Enlarge

     Dig Deeper

Below you can use the following links to:

1. Watch a video of this 
    lesson taught

2. Listen to this lesson
    taught on MP3

3. Print this lesson
family chart